three.

you arrived at 9:05am on may 14. 9 lbs 9 oz of pure yummy. you were all cheeks and chins, and we couldn’t wait to get our hands on you. we spent most of that first day pretty quietly, before all of the visitors started arriving … me and daddy holding you, inspecting your long fingers and your little wisps of dark hair, kissing your cheeks until i’m sure you squawked in your little newborn way. i remember being so grateful for the quiet – i knew that very soon your big sister would be arriving and making her presence known in her own (sweet & special) way, so i clung to those hours when it was just the 3 of us. i was, and am, so very thankful that god chose me to be yours, and you to be ours. so very thankful for our stella jane. 

i can’t believe our bitty is THREE. in some ways it feels like it’s all going so fast, but in other respects may 14, 2009 seems like a bajillion years ago. tonight we watched a bunch of videos from when stella jane was a baby, and it honestly seems like another lifetime. how can that round and squishy little baby be this same feisty girl running around today?

these past few days i’ve been thinking about how much i just really and truly enjoy our girls. i expected to love them, and worry about them, and want to protect them. but i wasn’t prepared for how much i would just love hanging out w them. they are these sweet little people, with these funny and crazy and silly and serious little personalities. they confuse me and amaze me and terrify me and surprise me on a daily basis. and to be perfectly honest, most days i feel incredibly ill-equipped to be their mommy. true confession: WE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT WE ARE DOING. but i just love that we are on this journey together – they are teaching me as much as i am teaching them, and hopefully one day we’ll figure this whole life / parent / child thing out. but in the meantime, we’re doing our best to love and forgive and encourage and laugh and hug and make mistakes and start again. and again.

we celebrated bitty’s big day yesterday with sweet friends, a VERY sugary cake, and lots of playing & laughing. last year stella’s birthday was right before we moved, and i remember feeling so rushed and unprepared and a little guilty that her day was overshadowed by everything else going on (not to mention how i DROPPED HER ELMO CUPCAKES ALL OVER THE FLOOR. megs / andrea – thank you for not missing a beat, scooping them up and eating them anyway. you guys are the best). so yesterday felt like another item on the ‘look how far we’ve come’ list. my girl was so very happy, which made her mommy so very happy. it was the best day.

sending lots of love from the birthday girl. here’s to THREE. xo.